The Road Less Traveled

I love being aunt and especially getting to welcome a new baby! We're still in csection waiting limbo but soon Jace will be arriving before the morning is over and I will have a second nephew to love on. 😍 Maybe that's why I'm on here blogging instead paying attention to baby updates! Two nephews to love on. Will is at that fun age where he's discovering everything and telling us about it and has cute little things he can't say right and also repeats things we say which is mostly adorable but will one day get that adorable boy in trouble. 😄 And the fun part of this baby coming today is I get to stay at the hospital at night so my brother can go home to be with Will. I love loving on babies! 😊 Andrew reminded me that while we're continuing to wait for our own miracle we can take joy in our nephews and our friends babies and love them. (And it's good practice for Andrew since he's hasn't had as much practice around babies) Waiting may be hard but we...

Wow! It's been a while and I am sorry just been a little busy. Update on weight situation is I am down 40 pounds! 🙌🏻🙌🏻 I have stopped taking the phentermine and have been maintaining my weight. I would love to lose the last 20 pounds but there are bigger things to look at now. So no more waiting and just walking the path. We're going to start doing things to help the process along and get pregnant as soon as possible no matter how much money it takes. I will go get a loan for $14,000 to have IVF if I have to! Went to a consultation today to make sure this happens and the Dr does an ultrasound and he is very happy with what he sees. My ovaries went from looking like a a chunky chocolate chip cookie from all the cyst to only have a couple of cyst on my left ovary. 😃 He is also bragging about my weight loss and he goes through what he thinks we should do. 4-5 months of taking the fertility pills on days 5-9 of my cycle then ultra sound on day 14 to see if it worked and ther...

I'm wearing clothes that I bought in college! It's so much fun to say that!!! I still need to lose about 20 more pounds to be completely healthy and for my BMI to be "healthy" but I am happy with my progress! 30 pounds gone and I'm finally feeling good!!! Now let me also say that even in high school when I was at my skinniest, my BMI was still in the overweight range. I was a size 8 and I'm 5'6 so I wasn't tiny but I didn't have any rolls either. Why was my BMI overweight? Because have been a 36 DD since 8th grade and my bottom has NEVER been little! So even if I lose the weight they want me to, I'm still going to be "overweight" and I told my doctor this and he's answer was he didn't believe that so yeah now I'm  determined to lose the weight and go in and say told you so! (At this point in this process it's little things like that that help me get through another month of not being pregnant.) Speaking of the doctor,...

Here comes honesty at it's best. I have cried more in the last week than I have in YEARS! It has been almost daily, including while at my monthly visit with the doctor to check my weight. I thought surely with 25 pounds gone, this would be the cycle that there would be two line instead of one on the dreaded pee stick. But NOPE. just one line again. And with out being too graphic, lets just say the effort was defiantly put in on making the baby. And then before I could even go to CVS and buy the test I woke up one morning and found that again, it was not our turn. Doctors has assured me that getting healthy and losing weight was the ticket to my problems so why is this still so hard for us? Sitting in the room with the doctor as he handed me more and more tissues, he looked at me and said "Hannah, stop letting everyone tell you that when you stop worrying about it that it will happen because most of the people saying that to you have NO idea how it feels to be going through wha...

Sorry for the extended time between post. Been VERY busy! Doctor's appointment went very well- progress was going as it should. We had a few parties to go to and Andrew's training has been taking up most of his time. I was at a friends surprise baby shower that we threw for her and we had an absolute blast! I was asked if it was hard for me to go to other's baby showers with what I am going through and I can honestly say it isn't. I love to other's and their happiness. I am the kind of person who gets absolutely into giving other people joy! I know that one day, I will be pregnant and when I am I will get to be on the other side that and it will be the most amazing blessing. Until then, I will continue to take complete joy in making my friends absolutely happy! Father's day was so much fun! We had cook outs and dinners with our family and we had a blast. Family time is always the best- the people that you love most around you and getting to laugh with them. Ju...

At our April appointment, as I said last time, we began the weight loss journey to a healthy me and hopefully that would lead to a healthy pregnancy. So for a month I counted calories and fat. Between 1100 and 1300 calories a day and no more than 20 gm of fat a day (the fat part is WAY harder). Keeping my food diary after every meal and calculating what to eat, looking up everything before I would buy it/order it. Soon found out that the fat was what I needed for focus on! I would be at 19 gm of fat and only 800 calories. WELL POO! Gotta find something fat free to eat for diner-which is nearly impossible to do and find something that would fill you up!  So I go in for my May weight check with the doctor. Scales say 10 pounds down! YEPPIE! On top of that, my body had done something it hadn't done in about 10 years. I had a normal cycle without the help of any medications. That was a crazy feeling! To know that with just 10 pounds, my body had started to remember- OH YEAH I am s...

The journey we have been on so far has already been 2 years and at this point, the end is not in sight-yet. For two years we have been trying to start our family. I decided to begin blogging about it because it has helped me to see I am not the only one struggling so I am hoping to be that inspiration to someone else. My husband and I met in 2011, got engaged in 2012 and got married in 2013. We decided to wait a year to start "trying" to have a baby so I stayed on birth control for the first year we were married. I had been on birth control since I was 19 years old because of menstrual migraines. I took the one that you only had a period every three months and gave you a low dose of hormones on you period week to prevent your hormones from bottoming out and causing the migraines. I had no reason to fret over not having a period every month so I enjoyed the freedom of taking the pill every morning and only having to deal with the "monster" every three months. Never ...